In addition to vision and purpose, the clarification of your values is critical to your success.
Values are different than vision and purpose; they are best described as behavioral needs and standards that work to support your vision and purpose. They are simply another layer of the same onion.
Not only is values clarification important to interacting and working with others, it has the greatest impact for you, personally and internally.
Have you ever met a person who said their family was very important (value) to them but you knew that they never spent any time with them? Or an employer who identified honesty as a value in doing business, but whose business behavior was dishonest?
What credibility did those people have with those around them? Questionable at best, but over and above this outside lack of credibility is the internal price these individuals pay by not being congruent. When we are not clear about our values or when our actions contradict our stated beliefs, we short-change ourselves in the areas of our own credibility, performance, and confidence. We set up an inner conflict within ourselves.
1. You must be clear about your core values. Your values guide your decisions and behavior and can bring you mental and emotional freedom.
2. Values should not be for sale; they must be non-negotiable. If your values have a price, I contend they are not really your core values.
In a seminar I was conducting using CRG’s Values Preference Indicator (VPI), I asked individuals to identify their Top 7 values from a predetermined list of 21 values.
Many participants wanted to choose more than 7. Therein lies the power of this process. The reality is that people’s decision-making priorities are based on placing one value above another. And you can’t give top priority to all 21 values. Choices must be made.
Some participants wanted all 21 values in top spot. Others believed they didn’t need to clarify or confirm their top values.
With the over 30 attendees, it was quite obvious who had previously given thought to the hierarchy of their values and who had not. Those who had not were restless, uneasy, and less content.
After the individuals ranked their Top 7 values, we asked them to share their lists (called List A) within their small groups—but with a twist. At the end of the exercise, we asked participants to restate in order the Top 7 values of the person sitting next to them. Most were unsuccessful with this simple request. Why? Values are inherently personal and important only to the individual who makes it a value.
In the third part of this values workshop, we asked participants to rank each value against every other value on the list of 21, using a scoring matrix. This forces people to make choices. The process confirms that identifying your priority values is ALWAYS about making choices of one value over another. This scoring matrix was called List B.
Would it surprise you to know that, in many cases, List B created by the forced choice process was different than the previous list (List A), using the same 21 values?
Based on feedback from thousands of participants who have completed our Values Preference Indicator we have identified the two most common reasons for this discrepancy.
- Individuals try to embrace a value that someone else has imposed as a priority. This pressure could come from anyone of influence or even the media. One of the values included in the VPI is wealth. The media message all around is us that money should be everyone’s top priority. But for numerous individuals, money is not a Top 7 value priority, other values come first.
- Many people have never clearly identified or clarified what their values are; they have simply guessed at what might be important. The result is that their priorities shift with every blowing wind or daily influence. That is a very unfulfilling, unstable, even mentally dangerous way to live.
Finally, once individuals in the seminar confirmed their priorities, we asked them to look at their life and rate the way each value was currently being met from a time and energy perspective.
If a value was identified as not currently being fulfilled, we asked participants to document action steps to change that negative into a positive.
One man did not have even one value in the category of “currently being fulfilled.” His demeanor was that of a severely depressed person. Given his lack of life satisfaction, that was quite understandable. His daily life was not meeting even one value need. He was starved for any fulfillment. At the end of the program, he broke down in tears and was thankful he now had a formula to change and improve his life.
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Complete the Online Values Preference Indicator, to take you through the elements mentioned above, or make a list of possible values.
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Confirm your Top 7 values.
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Review your list; determine if these values are being fulfilled and met.
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If a value is not being fulfilled, document potential actions to change that status.
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Let a close friend review your list and give you feedback. Does your list of values accurately reflect your actions and behaviors?
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Review your list on a regular basis.
Values clarification is critical; it applies to all relationships, teams, and organizations. That will be the basis of discussion for another issue.
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